Mandatory Sex Parties

It's a well known fact that I'm incredibly awesome. Really, it's true. What? I can't help it. I was just born this way. As admittedly awesome as I may be I am also well aware that there are those out there who are far, far awesomer than even me. Take Allie, for example. I discovered her blog last week while I debated whether it'd be more painful to staple my tongue to my lip or to stab my calf with a letter opener at work. Allie is tremendously awesome.
As I made my way through her old posts I came across her bit about the Mandatory Sex Parties, unbeknown to her, a term created in an erratic need for an outrageous statement. When she realized that no one had ever used that term before she decided she'd start a campaign to get the phrase popularized.
This post is partly to spread the word, but it's also reflective. I started to think about mandatory sex parties and wondered what exactly they would entail. Sex as a requirement, for one, that's obvious. Or is it? Is the sex mandatory or is attendance mandatory? If so, what would one do if invited but unwilling to participate? Would the invitation come with an RSVP card with only a "Yes, I will be attending" box? How exactly would the rule be enforced, though? Would these be a new social requirement? "You must attend a MSP at least once every 6 years."
Would admittance to these parties be invitational only? Is it some raunchy free for all where all are welcome so long as they are prepared to get down dirty with their private parts? What kind of sexual activities would one be required to partake in? Does masturbation count as sex? Could one show up to one of these parties and sit in the corner and spank it while others got freaky with each other?
Are these house parties or would the take place at one of those orgy houses (that's what I call them anyway) where people pay to get in and then have sex with strangers? I would think this would need to be more of an organized event than just "Hey Tommy, you're invited to my Mandatory Sex Party. Bring your own condoms! I really hope to see you there from 6:30 to 9:30 on Friday night. There will be refreshments and comfortable pillows." There should be consent forms, health checks, and the department of sanitation would definitely need to be involved.
In retrospect, I hope this term never takes off. I'd be very afraid of some creep eventually taking the joke way too seriously and trying to actually have a mandatory sex party. And what if people like them? I would dread checking my mail every day. I'd shiver every time I saw an invitation envelope. I'd tremble every time a friend approached me with a piece of paper in hand. Checking my e-mail would be a nightmare what with evites being just a click away. Oh the horror! The horror!!